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*Note: Please put your current locations as most of us are lucky enough to claim Greensburg as our hometown.
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19 comments:
Drinking out of Arlington, VA...he is the reigning Log & Tire Toss Champion... he checks in at an imposing 6'2'' 220 lbs! He is a graduate of the Brand Walsh school of training...He is,, Dan "Crazylegs" Conte!!!!!!!!!
Standing at 5'7'' and tipping the scales at 150 lbs, he is the self-proclaimed pound for pound best beer chugger in the Memorial and is currently the Memorial record holder for most the pukes during a competition....Drinking out of Las Vegas, Nevada....Ladies and gentleman...Greg "The Beekeeper" Plundo!!!!!!!!
Ladies and gentlemen... Ittt'ss Tiiimmmeee! Introducing the warrior standing in the blue corner. This man stands 5 feet 7 and one half inches tall, weighing in at one hundred and forty eight pounds... Drinking out of Boulder, Colorado. He is your reigning, defending, undisputed enthusiasm extraordinaire of the world! Riiccckkk "The Wedgebussstterr" Dooouuglasss!!!!
Making his way to the competition is the nimble yet spry, 6'1 220 lbs, alarmingly good looking, coming all the way from Hilton Head, SC he is..... Tyler "Big Sweaty" Reese. Even though this will be Sweaties 1st memorial he comes in with high expectations after winning the Mike Garland Sunkist chugging challange 2 years running.
Hailing from Chicago, IL, feast your eyes on the 10-foot tall beast man approaching the ring. With a bad taste in his mouth from last year's competition, the undisputed "King of Sting" is looking for revenge. Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, you all know and love him, JC "The Jiggaman" Cobb!!!
Approaching the cabin, the man with the biggest chip on his shoulder possible, you know him as Hands, Stories, MC Balance, Cheesy Matt, Dancin Matt, and Big Bull, he has one of the worst work ethics in the competition and someday aspires to be paralyzed in a sporting event only to give thumbs up to the crowd as he is wheeled off - Standing at 6'0" and weighing in at a mediocre 160lbs, From The South Hills of Pittsburgh .... Matt "Dont Call me Rattsfield" Plundo!!!!!!
Hailing from the Quad Cities, standing at a dominating 6'1 170 lb Greek God-Like physique. He accomplished a 3.53 second chug in the off-season, which is what catapulted him to the top of last year's competition. The reigning Champion of The Memorial: Patrick "The House Always Wins" Newhouse!!!!!!!!
Driving in from the Burgh, is the arrogant, former high school single game state rushing record holder, multi school record holder, undisputed BMOC from Hempfield High School....Matt "the BMOC" Steve! What the BMOC lacks in chugging ability is offset from his sheer determination to never lose to man named "Gail".
Hurling into the ring from Steel City, PA...he is a trim 5'11", 185 lbs of piss and vinegar- a graduate of Philcore's School of Hard Knox and former heavweight champion of home wrestling in '91 and '92. A man who needs no introduction anywhere in the civilized world and who's Joe Esposito beer bong theme song has been known to bring kings to their knees and women into his beds. Sporting number 21 for the Cathedral Dukes but number 1 in your hearts, Matt "Thunder" Dahar!!!!!
Ratt..I figured you would have packed on a few more lbs. to that girlish figure of yours now that the jiggaman doesn't have access to your deep dish pizzas and chicken fingers!
Hey King of Stink, you left your purple sweatpants at my place. I'm tired of chasing you and brother Donovan around.
Items to consider bringing:
1- spikes & gloves
2- beards
3- temporary tattoos
4- bandanas
5- Matt Steve's high school heisman trophy award
6- Greg's beekeeper suit
7- A oil painted portrait of "Gene"
8- "Forever in Blue Jeans"
9- Rogaine for Rattsfield; Rogan for Cobb
10- Mickey Spiezio's Greatest Double Peanuckles Tape
11- 3 Cases of Sunkist
12- Joseph L. DeWarr's
Marcus Fuhrman
If BMOC does well at all this year, we'll have to bring in Marcus Furman next year to take away any of BMOC's records or accomplishments!
also consider bringing, cut-off jeans, tank tops (neon colors encouraged), mustaches, a cassette of Blessed Sacrament Cathedral choir singing "fifty nifty united states, rumikub, tube socks, starter jackets (it gets cold up in the mountains), and thunder's dukes jersey.
Don't be mistaken Gail, I will be competing at 100%. I don't have a torn hamstring or tendonitis for you to take advantage of like before.
http://www.theangryt.com/article.php?id_art=176
This video clip is so confusing and exhilerating. I don't understand how these guys - let's call them Paul & Morgan Hamm - know that they can do all of these moves/jumps.
Conceived in the bathroom of a KISS concert, a hybrid partier was born. Given a bottle of Ram's piss since birth and knowing nothing better than the sweet taste of Yuengling Lager, "Brain" is looking forward to fulfilling his life's purpose at The Memorial. Ideally sized at 5'9" and 190 lbs., he will be able carry the heavest of Conte's or sling around the lightest of Plundo's. Arriving from the high country of Denver, CO introducing...the return of the prodigal son...Kevin "The Brain" Bowler!!!!!!!!
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